


slow dancing in a burning room

by Anonymous



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Slice of Life, lapslock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-11
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:27:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22664734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: baekhyun knows his place.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Kim Jongdae | Chen
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13
Collections: Anonymous





	slow dancing in a burning room

**Author's Note:**

> first published work on AO3, woohoo! this is actually a drabble for an rp i was in years ago. didn't have the courage to post it here at first but what the heck am i right

baekhyun knows his place.

he knows his place in his mother’s eyes. he knows his place in highschool. he knows his place in their shared house. he knows his place in the world. and baekhyun always acts accordingly to the role he’s given. actually reads the terms and conditions of the situation before clicking ‘agree’. to make sure he doesn’t say the wrong words or do the wrong thing.

but with kim jongdae, there was never a guideline.

it’s like walking on eggshells–their whole relationship. a drunken accident, two broken hearts and one bed. two pairs of arms keeping each other from falling apart. kisses shared as a form of distraction from the outside world. but none ever know what to actually do, what to expect and what kind of skeletons hiding behind each closets. no words shared within uncomfortable silences.

_should’ve known this relationship is doomed from the start._

and when those dreaded words finally came out of his curly lips ( baekhyun had always find it beautiful- like his eyelashes too. he wants to kiss them every time ), only then he had realized that maybe he should’ve learned his lessons.

a nervous laughter breaks the silence, too tight and too airy to be amusement. baekhyun’s eyes travel down towards the wall, then the window, until it settles down on the floor instead. anywhere that is not jongdae is fine so it wouldn’t hurt too much. there’s a crack in his voice as he speaks; “so… this is it? we’re done?”

a little part of him wishes the other would say no- or maybe keep his mouth shut and hug him instead. but baekhyun _knows_. he knows that he doesn’t have the rights to tell jongdae to stay. he knows that he doesn’t even have the right to touch him. _he’s not important enough_. what they had this whole time was just a band-aid to cover the wound, not even close to being healed.

“can i… at least, kiss you?” the question was meant to be kept to himself, but ends up being blurted out of the blue. hesitant steps pull him towards the younger boy, now only a few inches away from him. lower lips tugged harshly by his front teeth as he waits for jongdae’s answer. when a nod comes, immense relief washes over his entire being.

even after this whole time. he had tried not to get attached. not to put too much room for jongdae in his space. thinking maybe after his ex-girlfriend he can finally learn how to properly shut people out. but in the end this is inevitable and baekhyun is once again set to mend his tattered heart by his own.

_go on, twist the knife. maybe now i’ll learn for real._

their kiss is surprisingly gentle; no teeth, no urge behind it. just an easy, slow slide between lips. baekhyun wants to savor this moment. wants to remember how soft jongdae’s lips against his. the shape of it as they kiss for the last time.

when they finally part, the pink haired boy finally mustered enough courage to look at jongdae in the eyes and flash him his brightest smile. not for long because baekhyun isn’t desperate enough to pull the ‘cry in front of your boyfriend-turned-ex’ method and possibly commit another social suicide. he chose to walk away right after….

…….only to halt in his steps.

“was i too overbearing for you?” a sudden shot in the dark. he doesn’t even care if his voice is already croaky. flashes of _her_ face invades his mind and baekhyun has to take a deep breath before being able to continue with his words. “too nosy?”

_your feelings… was it genuine?_

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter](https://twitter.com/beastsaku) | [tumblr](https://hiyokuroku.tumblr.com/)


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